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  A Messed Up Mind
  A Messed Up Mind
  A mind full of messed up stuff isn’t as strange as one may think. 本書重組一般人對「精神失常」的概念。
   
 
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作  者:Andy Chen(陳立恩)
類  別:文學小說
出  版:白象文化
出版日期:2020年2月
語  言:英文
I S B N :9789863589440
裝  訂:平裝

定  價:NT$280

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◎This isn’t a novel. This is a collection of random stuff. Well, ‘random stuff’? Dive in to find out.
獨創「非小說」體裁,翻翻看,真的只有「對話」及「詩篇」!
◎The characters are anonymous, and the narrator is absent. So time to stimulate your imagination, and enjoy the bizarre ride.
沒有人名的對話,刺激讀者的想像,邀您共遊奇異之旅。

This is the fourth book by Taiwanese teenage author Andy Chen, and unlike his previous works, there are many changes.

This is not a novel. This is a book made out of 26 short stories, with a handful of poems and imaginary rap lyrics. The stories are mostly unrelated with each other, and so are the poems and imaginary rap lyrics.

The rap lyrics sections in this book exist only in print and never in audio form, so the flows of the lyrics are up to the reader to decide-if readers want to spit the lyrics.
Random Disclaimer: The lyrics may contain offensive language and content (though neither frequent nor excessive). So better keep your kid away. If readers want to rap them out loud, don’t spit the lyrics at the wrong occasion. Don’t write any bit of them in the form of graffiti either. In general, don’t do anything that may cause repercussions, repercussions that has something to do with the lyrics.
If anyone gets in trouble because of reading the lyrics out loud at an inappropriate occasion; writing them in graffiti or committing any kind of potentially bad action that’s lyrics-associated, the author is not responsible. Possible readers, it’s made clear. So be cautious and do not blame the author if anything bad happens.

The book is the author’s first adult-oriented work to date, so listen up kids: Hands away from the book. Capiche?

The book is mostly inspired by the author’s life himself and rap songs ranging from the late ‘90’s to the modern ones. Themes in the book include rebellion, suicide, addiction, depression and inequity.
Dialogue is a prominent medium of storytelling throughout the book. The narrator, however, is almost entirely absent. Characters’ names are hardly shown or revealed. There are several non-human characters.

Notice: The book is pretty weird. Here are five examples of the book’s short stories:
1. Two polar bears entering a heated argument which soon escalates into a fight and things get worse when a human gets caught in the midst of it.
2. A porn-addicted slob is sleeping calmly, but gets awakened by a ghostly voice. The slob soon finds out that the owner of the voice is-predictably, a ghost. Or is it something more?
3. A dumb kid forces his younger brother to snort white powder with him. The younger brother tries to decline, yet eventually snorts a lot of white powder.
4. Two girls tried to take pictures of themselves with a celebrity, who both the girls are obsessed with. One girl wants a photo of herself with her idol. Turns out, she doesn’t get the photo she wanted, which the other girl laughed at her for. Stuff gets heated.
5. Two friends found out that their house is vandalized by an unsanitary, violent, deranged person. The psycho gets into a vicious fight against the two friends.

《A Messed Up Mind》(《混沌》)為陳立恩第四部出版作品。此書與作者前幾部作品風格截然不同。
1.為作者第一部短篇故事及詩篇合輯。
2.本書篇幅簡短,普遍使用非裔英文方言,給人耳目一新感受,深刻的文字內涵,更值得讀者慢慢咀嚼。
3.本書的短篇故事沒有旁白、人名,只有角色的對話內容。
4.二十六篇短篇故事中,少數篇章有情節上的關聯,要找出其中相關性,需要讀者充分思考、發揮觀察力!
5.部分情節生動描述精神病患者病狀,宜滿十五歲以上身心成熟者閱讀。

   
 

   
 

DIALOGUE A
You ain’t really as good as you think, huh?

Look, I’m talkin’ to you. If you’re really as good as you thought, you won’t be doing this.
‘Chu mean by that?
Why I gotta explain this? You’re real sure ‘bout everything you’re doing, don’t act dumb.
I ain’t dumb. But I dunno what you’re sayin-
Why you always messing ‘round with no purpose and not changing? Why you wastin’ your time ‘round stuff that never ever matters?
Dude, stop preachin’ me-
Preachin’? Think I’m just being snarky and preaching you? I’m tryna help you get outta this lazy state you stuck in. But you never listened and never tried to get out. You never understood what you stuck in.
I ain’t stuck in nothin’!
You are.
Ain’t!
You tryna argue wit’ me?
Who wanna argue wit’ you? Look, I’m livin’ comfy wit’ my own life and it’s real stable and so nice…I ain’t stuck in no messed up place or-now you’re tryna take me outta my space and for what? Besides, I ain’t messin’ wit’ you, why you mad?
‘Cause I’m your friend!
Friend? Nah, don’t kid me, bro, you ain’t my friend. If you are, you won’t be talkin’ smart in front me like that.
You ain’t got friends, huh, nerd?
Why care about friends? Don’t need ‘em! I got this computer so I can fap real nice and no one can bother me. I live by myself so I don’t gotta worry ‘bout someone catching me nuttin’ while watchin’ porn while vibin’ to rock music at full blast. Look, how dope is that? I’m like the king of my own place, bro! It rocks! You gotta try it!
You’re so pathetic.
You are bro. You’re stuck as a straight-A student who can’t live his own life, but I can. School sucks! Who needs school? I would work in a McDonald’s rather than takin’ science class. But I won’t work in a McDonald’s, whatever.
You don’t understand, homie. Do you know whatchu gotta live for?
I know for a long time. This! You still actin’ skeptical, huh? Your mind brainwashed by deez lame parents, you know? Why so obedient? Ain’t joy humans all wanna live for? Duh, and deez crazy parents and schools and stuff tryna make us sad so we hang ourselves or leap off buildings and…The world sucks, you know that too well.

Bro? Is you feelin’ okay?
Listen up, fool. I know better than you.
Naw-
Zip it. Listen to me right now and if you tryna cut me off, I’ma make you look pretty.

Okay?
Bro, why you intimidating me? So confusing-
Shut it. What did just I tell you? Alright, look. If I ain’t yo’ friend, I won’t be here talkin’ to you ‘bout so much. Listen to me. You won’t be happy if you continue on livin’ lazy like this.
Why care, bro? Why care so much ‘bout stuff, bro? If we don’t sweat anything, then stuff won’t matter. Just won’t, homie.
You’ll regret it if you continue thinkin’ like that.
I won’t.
Stop lyin’ to yourself, bro.
You know what I’ve been through. Stop askin’ me to change, capiche?

Why…can’t you just listen for a minute?
This is my life, you nosy-ass nerd.
Well, I had it.
What?
I have enough of you, cocky-ass fraud.

Y’want some nice beef, huh? How’s dat?... HUH?
Get yo’ dirty hands off me!

Take dat! Eat this!
You gon’ regret this, homie.
Ain’t! Want yo’ face smacked a few more times again, huh?
You better leave. Right now.
You don’t wanna mess wit’ me, I’m just sayin’-
Leave or I’ll make you real nice.
You ain’t as wise as you thought, homie. You ain’t better than me. Sure, you may be different from me, but you so pathetic. Failin’ to communicate peacefully and endin’ up real mad, huh? You so frustrated ‘cause you are forced to get good grades by yo’ parents, you just jealous of my life ‘cause you wanna be free but you can’t. You wanna make me miserable like you. You wanna make my life messed up like yours.
Shut up-
Ain’t finished. I can see right through yo’ faked demeanor. You ain’t as wise as you thought. If you so wise, then why you get real disrespectful in the first place? This my privacy, my turf, bro, and you invaded it. You should be the one to leave. You tryna get me outta here so you can take all of my stuff fo’ yourself to binge on, you selfish fraud. Got it? Quit talkin’ down on me and get outta my crib or I’ll make you look like scrambled eggs.

I won’t leave ‘til you listen what I say-
Just bounce, will you? I’m tired of repeatin’ the same thing over and over and over…be respectful fo’ a sec.
I ain’t being disrespectful-
Sure you ain’t.

I’m outtie.
So long, brotha!
Whatever!
Don’t come back! Hear me? DON’T EVER COME BACK, SUCKA!

Hah! I’ma hop back on Pornhub!

Why…I feel…so…I ain’t gon’ cry, I ain’t gon’ cry…God, I ain’t finna-

What wit’ all ‘em voices in my mind?

No, no…Get outta my mind. Get out.

Get out, please, I can’t…I can’t…Look, don’t. I don’t wanna make a noose on tha ceiling, just stop! Stop! Just stop this! Please!

Stop! STOP why I can’t stop my hands from-

Get off the noose! GET OFF THE DAMN NOOSE -
…gaaaahhhhh….ugggggllluugggggghhhhhh…ugggghhhhh…
****
Homie! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to be so harsh! Look, don’t tell me to bounce this time, ‘cause I’ll just settle this and just-

Bro? Where you at?

Bro? God, is this dude on the second floor?

Homie! Where you…

What have I done?

Why…did you do this? How could you? How could you?

I should’ve…Homie, you should’ve called me. You should’ve done it ‘fore you would kill yo’self, you…you…y’know what? I really loved you…but you never really acknowledged it…I don’t wanna say all of this…I just…

Where the gun at?

I should’ve let myself tell you everything and you should’ve listened. Whatever, I’ma see if this can take me to find you. Where the trigger at? Damn it, I pointed at the wrong-Agh-


以上內容節錄自《A Messed Up Mind》Andy Chen(陳立恩)◎著.白象文化出版

   
 

Andy Chen(陳立恩)

Andy Chen(陳立恩)is a seventeen year old senior high school student. He taught himself English generally at a young age and has interest in making works using the English medium. He has many handwritten, illustrated, amateur, non-published works, mostly wrote around the age of seven to ten.
When Andy was twelve, his first novel, Mankind vs Extraterrestrial, was published. This marks his first completion of a published work. Stan Duke and The Doll are the following published works of Andy, both published when he was thirteen. A Messed up Mind (this book you’re reading now) is his fourth published work.

 
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